My husband and I were having a conversation while walking the dogs a few days ago about what it really takes to create and sustain lasting change in your life. We have made monumental shifts in the last few years of our life and have created a life that is deeply aligned and meaningful for us. The road to get here was not easy but the best thing we ever did was commit to creating lasting change.
Have you ever been in the place of taking action and making a change in your life and things are going well, until something happens and everything falls to pieces? Raise your hand with me. I have been there. I have started down the path of creating lasting change only to be sidelined by roadblocks and adversity. Back to square one I went to begin it all over again. This can become, in the very least, old quite quickly, and at the most, utterly exhausting. How do we create a change that is sustainable?
It Is All Up To You
The best part about making any kind of decision in your life is that, as an adult, you have the freedom to choose. The terrifying thing about being an adult is that you have the freedom to choose. There is incredible power in our choices and that choice is vital to creating lasting change.
This weekend, I had the intense privilege of leading a workshop on radical self-love. I learned so much from the participants because of their willingness to share and be vulnerable. When that happens, everyone in the room benefits. The participants shared the desire to create lasting change in their relationship to themselves simply by showing up. This work is not easy and some of the participants shared that while they truly wanted to shift into a loving relationship with themselves, there was so much that was standing in their way that the change seemed insurmountable.
This is where the power of choice becomes the crucial element to creating lasting change. At any moment, we can choose to exercise our power to decide how we want to experience our life and how we want to treat ourselves and the people in our life. Our choices are powerful and they are the key to creating lasting change.
The Steps to Creating Lasting Change
The steps that I identify below are all things that I have done to create a life that is deeply meaningful and supports my desire to create a life I am in love with. The key thing is that the life I have created looks nothing like it did a few years ago because it is now in alignment for me.
- It Starts With You – the common denominator in your life is you. As an adult, you are in the driver’s seat. Life is not happening to you, it is responding to you and the choices you make. If you cannot see this, creating lasting change may continue to be difficult, if not impossible. Do not let this overwhelm you. Let this truth empower you. You don’t have to wait a moment longer to create change in your life. You hold all of the power in the moment that you choose to shift whatever it is in your life that is no longer working for you.
- The Hard Truth – You must look at how you are participating in the creation of your present reality. Are you waiting for something to happen to begin to live the life you truly want? I am here to empower you to take your finger off the pause button and jump in! The secret to creating lasting change is your consistent and diligent effort. There are zero magic pills or quick fixes.
- Be Prepared to Fail – Yes! You will fail. You will make mistakes and you will get sidelined. Things will happen that challenge you. That is the best part about being human. Again, you hold the power of choice: fall down ten times and stand up eleven. When you embark on the path to creating lasting change, don’t let the failures become the end of the road, let them inform a new path and a richer experience. Choose over and over again that you are going to keep moving forward.
- Get Crystal Clear – As you embark down the path of creating lasting change it is vital that you are crystal clear about what you are wanting to create. Get really specific about what your goals and desires are and make them 100% relevant to you. This is the time to release the voices of the people around you and empower yourself to create a life that is meaningful for you.
- Release the Things That Stand in the Way – When we are trying to create a change in our life we must let go of what is no longer serving us. In looking at what it is that you are creating, list all the things that are supporting that change and list all those things that are taking away from it. Everything on the first list is your roadmap for what is working well. Everything that is on that second list is standing in the way of you creating lasting change.
- Say No to Say Yes – If you are looking at the lists that you have created in step five and struggling with understanding how you are going to create the necessary and inevitable boundaries that come when you are creating a change in your life, use this little tool to support yourself. When I say no to something or someone, it is because I have a bigger yes that I need to listen to. It is why I am intensely careful about how I schedule my time or what I take on. My yeses are huge and they allow me to confidently, politely and firmly say no when I need to. Getting crystal clear about your priorities and why you are creating lasting change will empower you to free yourself from the burden of guilt that comes when you say no. Say no to whatever it is that doesn’t support the change you want so that you can say yes to everything that you are creating that serves you.
- Turn Up the Volume on Your Inner Voice – Creating lasting change inevitably causes a ripple effect. Let me tell you something that I absolutely know to be true: you already have the answers that you need. There is an immense amount of natural wisdom that exists in each individual and that inner voice or inner compass is a powerful guide by which you can create your life. Listening to your inner wisdom and owning that voice is critical to creating lasting change.
You hold the keys to success. True freedom is not a destination, it is an internal state of being. When you are living in alignment with the life that you have created and listening to your inner voice of love and truth, you will know what it feels like to be truly free. You can still be in the same job, in the same home, in the same relationship, but the shift will feel monumental and everything will look brighter. The thing about creating lasting change is that once you commit and clear away whatever isn’t working, sustaining that change becomes easier and eventually becomes your new way of being.
If there is one recurring truth that I always come back to, it is simply that our time is our most precious non-renewable resource. When embarking on the path of creating lasting change in your life, please keep this truth in your heart. Don’t waste your most precious resource living a life that is anything less that gloriously joyful and unique to you.
Tell me: how have you been able to create lasting change in your life.
I am here if you need support to create lasting change in your life. I can help you truly own your voice.